Coping with bereavement

How do you console someone when you are yourself in grief?

What words do you use when all the words sound empty and hollow when played in your mind?

Is silence better? How can it be when it can be misinterpreted for a lack of compassion - the furthest thing from the truth?

Some people are naturally great comforters. Most of us are so emotionally uneducated that we choose silence lest we say the wrong thing.

I haven't wept for a bereavement in my family in my 30+ years of life. Yet I have wept on the bereavement of the family of my prophet (pbuhaf) over and over again. While I have a new appreciation to God for the blessing of feeling grief for the injustice done to his prophets family, I am ill prepared on how to deal with the bereavement in my family.

Tears flow day and night and yet I have to say alhamdulillah. Our own bodies and souls are gifts to us which are both temporary and undeserved. How then about our children? From God both we and our children came and to God must we return.

I will end with a quote from God almighty Himself when He said in the Quran which was sent as a mercy and guidance for us till the end of time:

2:155 - 157

155. And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to As-Sabirin (the patient ones, etc.).

156. Who, when afflicted with calamity, say: "Truly! To Allah we belong and truly, to Him we shall return."

157. They are those on whom are the Salawat (i.e. blessings, etc.) (i.e. who are blessed and will be forgiven) from their Lord, and (they are those who) receive His Mercy, and it is they who are the guided-ones.

The power to be kind

Hi everyone,

I have always thought of myself as a well mannered and reasonably kind person, but was taken aback by a stranger's kindness to me so thought I'd share the story in the hope that it may inspire others to reflect and perhaps even seek out opportunities to be kind to others.

I needed a base for my baby car seat so found one advertised on gum tree with a car seat as well for only £20.

As I was unsure whether the universal base would fit my car seat I was quite pleased that it was being sold with the car seat too.

A brand new base alone is around £40 and all the other adverts were selling just the seat for more.

When I went to the gentleman's house to buy the goods, he spent 10 minutes showing me how it all worked. This was in spite of the fact that it was raining quite heavily while we installed the base into my car.  He had also machine washed it for me too.

When it came time to pay, I gave him £30 rather than the  £20 agreed because of how delighted I was with both the product and his service.

Being a follower of the ahlul bayt  (as), I was once taught at mosque that you should always agree a price before the work starts to avoid disappointment on the workers part and also to always pay a little more than the agreed price to foster good will and it stuck with me.

This gentleman refused the extra  £10 and beautifully told me to use it to buy something for my baby instead.

I walked away with a richer spirit and appreciation for the capacity for human kindness and the extra  £10 in my wallet meant less than  £10 in my wallet ever felt before.

I hope that you have found this post enjoyable and inspiring. If so, go and find someone to be kind to for no reason whatsoever :)